Our Sweet Angel

Our Sweet Angel

Sunday, May 25, 2014

It's a Boy!!


"A Chinese Cinco da Mayo Festival"

Sunday May 4, 2014

A gathering of close friends and family to celebrate Jake Jun Hao White

Some how a Chinese themed Cinco da Mayo party, held on the day before Cinco da Mayo just made sense and was as good a day as any to share laughs and love.

Thank you to all who attended the party and to the one's could not make it.  We truly appreciate your generosity and love. 

A special thank you to Wendy, Mun Sok and Shea for being the "hostesses with the mostesses".   We have never had the luxury of leaving our house two hours before a party and return with everything ready to go.  We LOVE you - you are the best!!!


Images of the Day


Senor Blanco


 "Wu Jun Hao"
A beautiful and tasty cake decorated by our dear friend Paula Cairns


 Heather and Michelle


 Amazing party decorations
 

Painted by our friend and Trevor's art teacher Lisa Hummell.   Year of the Rat (2008 - Trevor) and Year of the Dragon (2012 - Jake)- AMAZING!




 "Wu Jun Hao"
Created on the side of a gourd by amazing artist and friend Paula Cairns


 Customized fortune cookie messages.  The little details





 Why not???


Quite possibly the largest and most tasty fortune cookie ever.   Thank you Mun Sok.


 Balooooooons!!!!


 Isaac and Whitney (Heather's cousin)


 Good times


 Beautiful flowers from Grandma Barb and thank you to Carri and Darren for the wonderful lei's


 Fortune cookies, fake mustaches and Jake.   Oh Jake....you are in for it.


The ladies - Catherine, Wendy, Mun Sok and Bettina


Shea and Lee


 Wonderful Wendy and Heather


Friday, May 9, 2014

The 9th

Aloha Carmen.

Daddy and Mommy miss you so much.  There are so many more good days then there are bad days but today is not one of those days. 

Nineteen months ago you transitioned to spirit and although we know you are with us we would love to just kiss you and hug you so much.  It’s hard to live knowing this will never happen and still try to go on thinking about our future.   When I think about today I know I need to be strong but all I want to do is scream!!!  It is brutal to think about your stunning eyes full of light looking up at me, knowing that I can not see them again.  To want to grab you and spin you around, knowing that it is not possible.   I keep telling myself over and over that you are where you need to be and your spirit is so much bigger than I could ever imagine but honestly I just can not help but wonder, WHY???  Why can't I hold my sweet baby girl.   I know any parent would feel this way but the pain is unbearable when it starts to control me instead of me controlling it.

I know in my heart that I never took you for granted but there are definitely moments that I wish I made different choices and had more patience with you.  I have to admit, I do feel regret when I think about these choices now.   Thinking about these moments, when thought it was so important to discipline you or say "no" seems so stupid now.  But at the same time....you showed us how to live and fight.  I never once thought you would not be in my life.   If I lived thinking you were going to be gone I am sure I would have made different choices but that was never in our mind.   I always assumed I would see you grow up to be a beautiful woman.  To see you finish school and discover the world.  To walk you down the isle one day and see you become a mother and love your children like your mother loves you.   

Now, all that is gone and it is pointless for me to look backwards.   You taught us to live with love and that is all I can do.  The only thing that works for us; is to keep your legacy of love and light alive.

As you know, Team White has been busy and is close to welcoming Jake Junhao to the team.   So many incredible things are happening with Jake that we know you are involved making all this unfold perfectly.

Trevor is such an amazing boy because he had such an incredible big sister.   There have been a few fun things that have happened to Trevor recently, the Harlem Globetrotters and May Day Celebration, that made us so proud of him.   When I watch Trevor today, I am so filled with pride and love but also sadness.   It is so painfully obvious how much he misses you everyday.  He has been so strong and brave, trying his hardest to understand why the sister he loves more than anything is no longer around to play.  He wants so badly for you to be his role model, to look up to you and to ask you for help.

Trevor talks about you every day.   We tell stories about you and look at your pictures.  Usually Mommy and Daddy keep it together but just the other day I completely lost it in front of Mommy and Trevor after I heard your laugh on a video.  And...who came to comfort me but your little brother, giving me a big hug and telling me it will be okay.   Even though he does not have his big sister to keep him in line, I know that you are in his heart and helping to guide him down his path of life.

Mommy and Daddy are so thankful that you provided our family with the model of what to do in the face adversity and pain.   We try our best to make you proud.  To choose love over fear and joy over sadness.  

Carmen, my sweet baby, I miss you so much.  I will always cry when I hear your voice on video.  I will always wish I had one more dance.  I will always wish I could hear you say Daddy again in your little voice.   I will always love you.

Love Mommy and Daddy



 

 




Saturday, April 5, 2014

China Approval - We have the LOA!!!!

The Letter of Acceptance arrived from China Yesterday - 4/4/2014!!!!!

We are one step closer to welcoming Jake home!!!!

Travel to China will be somewhere between 12 and 14 weeks from now.   (end of June / early July)

Jake has received our first care package with pictures of us and he is now being told all about us by his care givers.


See you soon Jake!!   We love you.


Waikaloa Lavaman 2014 - Team Carmen - We Swam, We Biked, We Ran

Wow.....what a journey

Our first Team Carmen meeting was early September 2013 and from there we embarked on an amazing journey of planning, coordinating, networking, T-Shirt designing, printing, invitation design, organizing, auctions, emotional roller coasters, fundraising and training all focused on the completion of the Waikaloa Lavaman Triathlon on March 30th.

Team Carmen 2014 raised at total of $53,000

combined with Team Carmen's 2013 result of $33,000

For a combined two year total of $86,000 for Leukemia Lymphoma Society.

Below is the message that Heather and I provided to LLS that they displayed at the TNT Inspiration dinner on Saturday before the race.  It sums up everything we stand for;

 Team Carmen races in honor of our beautiful child, Carmen Leolani White who passed at 5 years of age, on October 9, 2012.

After Carmen was diagnosed with Leukemia on May 26, 2011, she never let it get her down.  She fought with a vengeance and the courage of a warrior, earning the nick name - Tough Little Princess.


When not fighting through her chemo therapy treatments Carmen loved every moment of her life and lived more in her 5 years than most people will live in a life time.

There is a quote by Joseph Campbell that inspires Team Carmen;


"The sin of inadvertness, not being awake, is the sin of missing the moments of life.  Live with unremitting alertness"

This is how Carmen lived and why Team Carmen races for Team In Training.  It takes determination, focus and courage to complete a triathlon but it takes love to come together as a team for a cause like Team in Training to raise funds so that other children like Carmen do not have to receive their angel wings so soon.

Mahalo for all of your support.


Love and Light

Carmen's Mommy and Daddy and all of Team Carmen.




Such an amazing an inspiring day.   The pictures say it all......


Team in Training - the full San Diego and Hawaii teams.   (Team Hawaii is Team Carmen)

 
 Team Carmen (minus Darren Miller who was signing autographs)


 The lovely Bettina and Heather


 All smiles before the start





 Michelle - aka - "Super Woman" getting her game face on


 LJ coming out of the water with an unbelievable time of 27 minutes.  


 Coming out of the of the water in not such an unbelievable time.  


Chris coming into the Bike transition


 Kevin and Wendy at the finish.   Kevin posted the best time on Team Carmen - 2:28 - not that anyone was counting. 


 Trevor is such a hero.  Dragging his old Dad across the finish line.


 Almost there Darren


 Mommy did not need any help


 Shea, Heather, Chris and T-Bone


 Team Riedel and Shea

 
Raising Money to cure Cancer and the Best Post Race Beer Garden in the World.  Cheers!!!

nice photo bomb Trevor!!!!!


 The amazing Brother and Sister Riedel Team.





 "but...but....but......I just finished a Triathlon.  Okay...you're right.....it's my turn to feed the baby."



 Florian and Chris getting ready.  Actually....we are realizing we are in the wrong spot and need to be where Florian is looking.


 Heather entering the bike transition


Thank you all for your support of Team Carmen

Sunday, February 9, 2014

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

Aloha to our friends and family,

Team White has beautiful news to share with all of you.

We have been pursuing a Chinese Adoption and have accepted a referral for a beautiful baby boy!! 

Carmen and Trevor's baby brother!!!!!!

His Chinese name is Wu Jun Hao and he is 16 months old today.   We have changed his first name to Jake, while keeping Jun Hao as his middle name  - Jake Jun Hao White.    Jun Hao is pronounced - Jun (june), Hao (how) and translates as:  Jun: gentleman/monarch, Hao: great/good.

We received approval from China last Monday and anticipate traveling no later than July 31st to bring Jake home!!!   He will be 21 months when we meet him.






Jake Jun Hao White

We were pulled to adopt from the special needs program in China.  Jake has a cleft lip and palette.   His lip has been repaired at Shanghai Hospital but we will be providing Jake with the excellent care and treatment he deserves to repair his palette.

Jake was found in a park wrapped in blankets on October 12, 2012.   They estimate his birth date to be either October 8th or 9th, 2012.   

This entire process started 12 months ago with Heather and I came to the realization that we had a child waiting for us in China.  It is hard to remember clearly anything that was happening in our lives in the early part of 2013 but this one decision seemed to be out of our hands.   As many of you know, the adoption process is long and full of incredible amounts of paper work.  We do not want to say it was difficult, because this was one of those beautiful things that doors continue to open for us one after the other.  The administrative part of the adoption, simply just flowed from one step to the next.  Heather is definitely the expert on the journey and she will share a more detailed post at a later date.

Part of the special needs adoption process was us filling out a medical form that lists conditions that we felt we could provide care for.   On this same form we indicated that our son or daughter would be between the ages of 1 and 4.  After we became logged in LID in China December 19th, 2013, we knew we could receive a referral anytime from that day forward and even waiting a year or more for a referral was not unusual.

 Adoption Documents.  Over 1,000 pieces of paper reviewed, completed, submitted, mailed, tracked and finally approved.

Henan Province, China.  See you soon Jake.

Early in the morning of January 20th, Heather woke from an extremely vivid dream that we had received a referral for a child from our adoption agency.  I had already left for the day to train before work.   After Heather dropped off Trevor to school at 7:55am, she received a voice message from the adoption agency!!  They had called her only one other time since we signed with them last February!  Before Heather called them back she excitedly called me at work to tell me about the dream!  I was fascinated by her dream I was anxious for Heather to call the agency back to hear what they had to say.

When Heather spoke to the agency, she let them know before they could saying anything that she had a vivid dream about receiving a referral last night.  After a pause.....the agency said...."Well.....that is incredible....because we have a referral for you!  A beautiful baby boy!!"

Heather learned a little information about Jake over the phone, including his estimated birth date of October 8th or 9th, 2012....Heather about hit the floor and knew immediately this was our child!

Words could never describe the overwhelming feeling of peace and clarity that came over Heather and I, after hearing Jake's estimated birth date.    Despite, knowing in our hearts that adopting a child into our family was perfect for us there were certainly times that we wondered how we would KNOW the child referred was OUR child.   With the wide range of ages we provided to the agency, to receive a child referral with an estimated birth date of when Carmen became spirit is the sort of divine intervention that you simply can not make up.

When Heather and I reflect back on our last moments with Carmen here on earth, we now understand that she was already working with her spirit guides to ensure certain things were in place before she became spirit.   We believe in our hearts, that Carmen needed to go to a special place so that she could help so many of us all at the same time.   To watch over us and her new brother Jake.

Though the timing between approval and being able to hold Jake will be longer than we would like, we are comforted knowing that Carmen is with Jake every second telling him all about his new parents, brother Trevor and dog Roxy.

And....then there is Trevor!  He is SO excited to be a big brother.   We wanted to capture this life changing moment to be able to show Jake when he's older!  Here's is a video link to us telling Trevor about Jake:   Trevor you are going to be a BIG BROTHER Video!!!




There are some other amazing things that have happened during this journey that we would like to share, in the theme of this blog post - "you can not make this stuff up".

During this journey we have been fortunate enough to meet people who are truly gifted intuitively.  Some we have sought out, others have approached Heather and I to share their insightful and powerful messages.  These messages have come from a place of love however they do not usually provide much context to help us understand their meaning.  Fortunately, Heather took the time to right down a few points from these conversations.  The two images below are of Heather's notes.   The first from last May and the second from August.   You can clearly see on the first note:  8 to 9 months, baby boy and putting him in my arms, blue.   The full conversation, was surrounding a vision shared with Heather of Carmen putting a baby boy, who was 8 or 9 months, wrapped in a blue blanket into Heather's arms.  The second note states the words, June and At Peace.  At the time, Heather did not understand this message but it certainly makes sense now that we are about to welcome Jun Hao into our family. 





We are so exited for this next chapter in our journey and look forward to sharing more with you as we have more information.

Love and Light

Team White


A picture of the care package we are sending to Jake.


 FYI, the Dum Dums and cookies are for the nannies and older kiddos.  The white cloth hopefully will go to Jun Hao as a snuggly as they usually are given a white wash cloth at bed time to snuggle with rather than blankets or stuffed animals.